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I do not accept friend requests unless I know you from the message boards or we have exchanged several messages. Requests from strangers will be rejected. I will not consider subs who reside outside the U.S. for anything beyond friendship. I don't care if you have a visa or if you're a citizen living overseas for work, it's just not gonna happen. This includes active duty military. Been there, done that, burned the t-shirt. Not going there again.
Here's the tl;dr version of my profile:
There is NO tl;dr version. If you're contacting me with the hope of serving, you need to read it. ALL of it. If you can't be bothered to take five minutes out of your life to read a profile, we are not going to be a good fit for each other.
Who am I? Good question. In no particular order I am:
a wife (see my couple profile: UnseelieCourt), a homeschooling mother, an honor graduate, a writer, bisexual, polyamorous, a dominant woman, a misanthrope, an INTJ, a bibliophile, an old school Goth, a lover of RPGs and Steampunk, a proud geek girl, an unapologetic omnivore who loves a nice, rare steak, lovingly sadistic, a fan of Laurell K. Hamilton and Joss Whedon, Leanan Sidhe, alpha to an energetic Pembroke Welsh Corgi/Australian Cattledog mix, a cat lover, a horse racing fan, addicted to Second Life, a Tarot reader, and Queen of Useless Trivia. Invader Zim is one of my guilty pleasures.
In the past, I've been a college student, exotic dancer, tourist in 6 countries outside the U.S. and 32 states, a cat owner, an administrative assistant, and amateur actress.
In the future, I'd like to be a world traveler, a grad student, an editor for a major fiction publishing house, owner of a big Victorian house with a small acreage, a certified SCUBA diver, a professional dominatrix, owner of ball pythons and sugar gliders, and Matriarch of a closely knit, poly-fi clan.
Some things you should know before contacting me are:
I'm at a point in my life where I'm not actively looking for a relationship but I'm open to possibilities. I'm more interested in meeting new, interesting people and just letting things happen organically. If I send you a message, don't assume I'm interested in anything beyond a friendly, platonic conversation. I typically select my romantic/play partners from among my friends, so you have to pass my test as a friend before I'll consider going further.
As much as I hate to admit it, I can't deny I'm a cougar. I'm seldom attracted to anyone less than 2 years younger than I am and all of my best relationships have been with people who were at least 4 years younger. My husband is 7 years younger. I can count the number of people to whom I've been attracted and who were older than me on one hand.
Deep down, I'm really superficial.
Okay, maybe not, but I won't lie and pretend physical attraction doesn't matter to me. Personality is more important than appearance and I prefer alternative looks to "traditional" ones (though I love the styles of Bettie Page and Audrey Hepburn), but if you have more spare tires than the Michelin Man, enough facial or body hair to carpet my living room, or your head is bare enough to pass for a bowling ball, chances are slim I'll ever be interested in more than friendship with you.
I have a texture fetish. I adore interesting tactile sensations and can spend hours petting velvet or running my hands over slick, glossy latex. If you're female, trans, genderqueer, genderfluid or feminine-leaning androgynous, attracted to women, height/weight proportionate, under the age of 45, submissive, polyamorous and look equally good in velvet or latex, you should definitely message me because I fail at ice breakers.
I come with an instruction manual. Yes, really. |
