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Journal Entries for SimplyMichael: |
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3/8/2010 1:48:07 PM |
Denise followed her master through the restaurant as they were led by the maitre de to their table. As always, it had been picked well in advance to ensure a view of the front entrance and yet keep his back to the wall, some old habits die harder than others she thought but she didn’t mind, it was one of the many reasons she always felt so safe with him. Master stood beside the table as she slid into the quiet corner booth and took her seat. He looked down at her for a moment and she felt that familiar warm flush spread over her as he held her eyes in his gaze. It was a tiny moment, the maitre de stood silent and probably hadn’t even noticed the intimate exchange and clearly this was not a place where he would acknowledge it even if he had.
As was their ritual, he relaxed and did a slow scan of the room, enjoying the voyeuristic pleasure of watching the other patrons while she scanned the menu to see what he would like. She smiled inside thinking how different he was, most masters order their own food but he had found that she had excellent taste and he enjoyed defying expectations, that and he just enjoyed using her in whatever ways amused him.
Moments after she set her menu down, their waiter appeared beside the table. She ordered the baby rack of lamb for him and the sole for her. “Will you be having wine with dinner?” he asked. “Yes” master said in that soft but commanding tone that just melted her, “the bartender has our two bottles, the white should be chilled by now” and before the waiter could mention the corkage fee, master dismissed him with a polite nod and with that, the waiter disappeared.
“You are a vision tonight my pet” master said as he held her hand in his. “I am looking forward to our very special evening” left his lips as the flush hit her face, that delicious shock of humiliation mingled with lust and that feeling of complete and absolute adoration for this man for whom she would clearly do anything.
With her face still showing the heat that was flowing through her body, she centered herself. She looked up at the waiter who had just arrived with the two special bottles of wine they had brought, white for her and a deep rich burgundy for him. She had trouble sitting still as the waiter slowly went through the elaborate ritual of uncorking the wine. Her thighs were throbbing as the waiter handed the cork of the white wine to master to smell and inspect and he looked at her as he passed it beneath his nose and uttered “perfect” and set it down beside his own glass. The waiter tilted the bottle and poured a half glass for master to smell the bouquet and again his gaze fell on her like a hungry lion as he swirled the liquid in the glass as he said “She will enjoy this very much, thank you”. He poured her a full glass and set it beside her plate and the ritual was repeated for his burgundy red wine.
With the waiter gone, they sat there in silence, not the awkward sort of people unsure of what to say to each other but the sort that only those who have the deepest connection can share. “May we devour each other and become one” her master said as they lifted their glasses for a toast. They drank not wine but each other, their gazes locked on one another as they shared this most intimate of moments with each other, each tasting the salty essence of the other in a way few would understand.Denise followed her master through the restaurant as they were led by the maitre de to their t
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2/27/2010 12:56:18 PM |
i just finished watching braveheart for the 100th time and movies like that always make me weepy and sappy and evoke the need to write bad poetry. for some reason i got to thinking about the nature of dominance and ownership.
i can own a book and never have to read it, never open its covers to discover its contents, never explore the deeper meanings or allow it to expand my mind. i truly own that book but so what? that ownership is meaningless in any way that matters. a child can own a book, a pompous ass can own a book as strongly and firmly as i. there is no reason to be proud of that sort of ownership.
owning an object is a passive act, once paid for, no further effort is required. it is merely an act of accumulation; it says nothing about me that i own this book or that one. however, unlike a book, owning an animal requires constant effort and how that animal behaves does reflect on their owner.
owning a dog is more complicated than owning a book. some dogs are allowed to run wild, undisciplined and untrained. however, a few months taken to instill discipline makes a huge difference and instills behaviors that last a lifetime. however, it doesn’t take much to earn the loyalty and affection of a dog. a few treats here and there, a pat on the head, and he is your best friend.
few compare their partners to dogs but falconry is often related to d/s, the beautiful noble bird flying free and yet returning to the hand of the master is an appealing analogy. i think it is a perfect analogy for many who chest thump about being master/slave. those falcons are let free only physically, their minds are chained and tethered to their owners. not by the character of the master, not because they earned that loyalty, but because the falcon has been raised to believe that nourishment comes only from their owner. they return only to be fed, not knowing they could nourish and sustain themselves. the chains that bind them are invisible to them and if revealed, the falcon would never return. that is neither mastery nor slavery as i use the words, it is fraud and deceit that keeps a falcon bound to their owner.
i strive to make my partner strong and free with no invisible chains, no fraud and deceit. i want her bound to me not by chains but by joy. i want to give her the heavens to be free in so that when she returns i know that out of all the men in the world she freely chooses to kneel only before me.
that to me is mastery and slavery and possession.
part of the difficulty of all this is how we use language. a perfect example is the word respect. i treat my partner with a great deal of respect and i have a great deal of respect for her as a person. that doesn’t keep me from treating her in other darker ways but no matter how low i take her, at some point, i reach out to her and offer her my hand to lift her back up to stand proudly next to me.
i push her to be a better person, not because i am a beacon of perfection but because i want her to be a better person. the respect comes in because i respect her enough to listen when she pushes me to be a better person as well.a i do not fear her being strong or having an opinion, in fact i encourage her to be strong and to have opinions.
she is bound to me not because i put a lock on her yesterday but because i inspired her today. she sees me allow someone else the last word, or share credit for an idea that was mine, or stop what i am doing to kneel down and give my full attention to a child. that is why she is bound to me.
i am not alone in this, i know others who have bound their partner to them not by chains, not by manipulation, but by showing their partner how to be free and find joy and they are together because nothing makes them freer and more joyful than being together. i truly treasure those people and those friendships.i just finished watching braveheart for the 100th time and movies like that always make me wee
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