|
|
Journal Entries for slvemike4u: |
|
3/13/2010 6:17:43 AM |
|
Happy St.Patricks Day to all of those who are Irish...or just wish they were....lolHappy St.Patricks Day to all of those who are Irish...or just wish they wer
|
|
3/12/2010 6:25:38 PM |
|
Well once again i have occasion to share happy personal news...i am no longer seeking it seems i have been found by the One i have been seeking...i remain here and partake of the threads,particularly the political ones lol.Well once again i have occasion to share happy personal news...i am no longer seeking it seems
|
|
3/7/2010 8:46:37 PM |
|
A question for others of my stripe....sub/slaves is there any pain equal to that of not getting what we seek....other than in getting it?A question for others of my stripe....sub/slaves is there any pain equal to that of not gettin
|
|
2/27/2010 1:16:55 PM |
|
Okay,i am in the middle of obtaining a pre-approved mortgage in California...with the (obviously)intention of buying a house on the left(and as i have always maintained ,wrong)coast....This is scary,i haven't owned a house since my divorce..hell i haven't rented a house since my son went off to college....but what with the market(it does suck to be profiting from the misery of others...well at least for a sub/slave type...You Domme types wouldn't understand...lol)but it is what it is and the market is right to buy.So,anyone reading this from out in La-La land...i am shopping in an area about one hour north of San Diego,,,and 2 hours south of LA..if you have information to share about the local BDSM community i would appreciate hearing all about it...i have some family out there...so what i need is a heads up on how to get plugged into the local scene community.....thanks for any help!Okay,i am in the middle of obtaining a pre-approved mortgage in California...with the (obvious
|
|
2/19/2010 9:08:25 PM |
|
After having spent the last 6 days helping a Domme move i am left to wonder about just what drives me....i am a sub/slave(please i know they are 2 different animals...but how different and just which one of them i am i go back and forth on)this is a given....what has me confused is just what is it that motivates me.In most instances i do know exactly what is 'in it for me'...there is usually some sort of quid pro qua in any exchange of efforts....in this i am not unlike most people,but ,of late ,and especially after the last week....i find myself involved in what i have up to now derided and disbelieved.... no strings service ...i would hear that and the first thought that came to mind was BULLSHIT.Yet here i am,i came for three days...saw there was a need for further help and stayed...why the change? Well i have thought about this and here's what i have come up with ...first off there is the Domme....i find myself smiling whenever i'm around her...and no kink activities need be happening,just sitting in a room with her makes me feel special...to actually be of service,service having no real connection to kink activities....makes me feel useful and fulfilled...so my thinking has now come full circle...but with a provision....you see i have come to realise that all along i have misinterpreted 'no strings' ,thinking that the meaning of this term meant no advantage for the sub/slave(and i fully realise this paints me as rather thickheaded but forgive me i'm irish...and probably not that bright)so again using my misinterpretation of the term...i say bullshit...for in truth i have probably derived more advantage from helping this particular Domme move than she has gained from that help...it all seems rather silly doesn't it...but look at it from my point of view...She gained some help in moving,She was going to get moved anyway...with or without me...i will leave the experience with so much more....a sense of accomplishment...a week in which i have gotten to fulfill the role i feel most comfortable in and the pleasure of her company for that period....and the cost to me...merely a sore back(okay given the condition of my back i could have done without that....lol)and ....shit,thats it...my sore back will pass....the warm feeling and the happy memories are mine to keep....once again somehow the slave comes out on top(i know thats sheer blasphemy....sue me....lol).a p.s. re-reading before posting this i realise i might be giving whosoever might read this a miss-impression...the Domme in question is a friend(involved with another) sure we scene together at times but there is and will never be any romance or long term commited r/t between us...its just not in the cards....and that is what makes all that has happened this past week so startling to me....i wasn't looking to 'score' here....i was just looking to serve.....thats so coooool !!!!After having spent the last 6 days helping a Domme move i am left to wonder about just what dr
|
|
2/10/2010 3:12:45 PM |
|
Can any night spent watching Bogart and Bergman in Casablanca be improved on?.....well sure watching with someone you loved....but hey,baby steps folks....baby steps.Sooner or later :) 'of all the gin joints,in all the towns,in all the world,she walks into mine'Can any night spent watching Bogart and Bergman in Casablanca be improved on?.....well sure wa
|
|
2/10/2010 10:44:31 AM |
|
Go figure....the admirers box on my CM account lit up...seemed I had a new admirer,well being the curious type I checked and went to this 'admirer's' profile.Than I wrote what I thought was a nice respectful letter thanking this Domme for adding me as an admirer....lo and behold letter 'deleted unread'.WTF.Okay one of two things happened...this is a Domme with a new profile who unfortunately i have had unpleasant dealings with...this is the most likely explanation....but still begs the question...why become an admirer of mine.Or and I don't think this one likely....this is a profile from someone not interested in any conversation......again though this would beg the question why make any sort of contact at all.No,I think it was the first....and my new admirer though nominally a Domme(and as a slave i am loathe to disparage a Domme)has slipped a few gears in her personal transmission.Either way no skin off my slave nose.Go figure....the admirers box on my CM account lit up...seemed I had a new admirer,well being
|
|
2/8/2010 2:17:36 PM |
|
Why is it that i seem to be the perfect slave for a large number of these 'cyber' Dommes.I seem to get two or three unsolicited letters from these pretty young things....all I need to do is join them(for free of course) on one of these sites that ask for cc#'s.A couple of months ago....after having perhaps more than a few I actually started down this path...entered some information (including the account #of a bank card) and than thought better of the whole thing....and ended the conversation at that point. Well sure enough checking my bank a couple of days later there was a $39.95 charge.....had my bank dispute it and all was good ...right.Wrong....a few months later looking at my overdrawn bank account I became aware that they had been drawing the 39.95 out of my account every month since the original dispute.Sure they had returned the original....but thought nothing of dipping back in for a repeating charge.....well I got all my money back...and told off one of their operators...but as per my banks advice I needed to cut up my card and get a new one issued.My only guaranteed method of keeping these blood suckers out of my account.A slave and his money are soon parted...all it takes is a beautiful woman batting her eyelashes at you and it seems common sense goes out the windowIn the case of this slave they all get the same answer now.....HARD LIMIT !!!!Why is it that i seem to be the perfect slave for a large number of these 'cyber' Dommes.I see
|
|
12/17/2009 6:14:28 PM |
|
Perhaps its the season...i have some history with the holidays and a certain level of depression is it seems to be expected.But each and every holiday season that i spend alone is like a weather mark...at some point i get around to convincing myself that next year will be different....but i'm starting to not buy that...lol.Here i am a slave...offering pretty much TPE for the right relationship...and yet i'm still alone....how pathetic is that.Over the last two days i have had two offers...the first came with a demand for a 250$ 'one time tribute'...to prove good intentions.....by the way that is pre meeting...lol,yeah not much chance that is an attempt to take advantage of poor desperate slave types :)The second was an enthusiastic Domme who agreed rather quickly to take on the responsibility of training me...all she required was a 2 or 3 hundred $ weekly tribute to compensate for her efforts.....life as an unowned slave sucks.Perhaps its the season...i have some history with the holidays and a certain level of depressi
|
|
12/10/2009 5:15:25 PM |
|
Why keep looking at my profile.....and why send poison pen letters...just move on,please . Seriously at this point I am going to do my best Grets Garbo impersonation...and request that you just leave me alone!Why keep looking at my profile.....and why send poison pen letters...just move on,please . Ser
|
|
11/23/2009 6:37:07 AM |
|
Seems like a quiet weekend...turkey hangover must have its grip on the majority of the Collarme community.....the mailman seems to be taking a few day off,hell even the forums are unusually silent.Seems like a quiet weekend...turkey hangover must have its grip on the majority of the Collarm
|
|
11/21/2009 5:00:27 PM |
|
Please folks whatever you do ,don't travel the day before Thanksgiving.....an 11 ,10 hour if i'm lucky traffic wise,trip took 15:30 hour(i no,the original posting said minutes...but that was just a fruedian slip)....seems like I drove at 10mph for the legnth of Virginia...damm i'm sore!!!!! Please folks whatever you do ,don't travel the day before Thanksgiving.....an 11 ,10 hour
|
|
11/1/2009 2:13:48 PM |
|
Under the heading of things I can not do.....Southern Fried Chicken,somewhere in between the buttermilk and the flour...I screwed up....The flour never'adhered' itself to the Chicken...so I wound up with some sort of camalized buttermilk batter skin done in vegatable oil.Southern Fried it was not.....but it was delicious...go figure.Under the heading of things I can not do.....Southern Fried Chicken,somewhere in between the b
|
|
8/31/2009 2:05:55 PM |
|
Okay...so the most beautiful young Domme type,who at present happens to be in London has been talking to me.Seems she would love to stop in New York and indulge my every slave fantasy on her way home to Texas.She has even shared some amazing professional style pictures with me.All of this will occur in a week and a halfWhat could possibly go wrong with this scenario?Okay...so the most beautiful young Domme type,who at present happens to be in Londo
|
|
7/21/2009 3:37:50 PM |
|
Previous journal entry was made in anger and as such should pretty much be disregarded...Whatever issues I am having were pretty much of my own making...or that of my father's why oh why did he marry Irish...i am thick headed.Previous journal entry was made in anger and as such should pretty much be disregarded...Whate
|
|
6/30/2009 5:33:35 AM |
|
Seems i'm no longer under consideration...by mutual consent a painful decision to end our r/t was reached.So the search continues,a little wiser and with a very good friend still in my cornerIt just didn't work and for that i am truly sorry .She was wonderful and taught me much....i will miss Her.Seems i'm no longer under consideration...by mutual consent a painful decision to end our r/t
|
|
6/21/2009 5:56:08 PM |
|
Wow,I haven't journaled in a good long while....still under consideration...and just returned fro an extended trip to New York...so happy to be home.Anyway in looking at some New York profiles I came across the name Ingred Bellemere and her book 'Owning and training a male slave'...in it she talks of consensual and non consensual slaves.Her definition of a non consensual slave is one who has freely surrendered his right to all his rights....and this is the last decision he makes as a 'free ma'...after he makes that leap he is property...nothing more.......sounds like NirvanaWhere do I find this?Wow,I haven't journaled in a good long while....still under consideration...and just returned
|
|
3/20/2009 11:29:59 AM |
|
So circumstances have changed forcing me to make a declaration here...I am under consideration by a Domme.This of course would mean I am no longer looking and am no longer a free agent....hence no more playing.I am exceedingly happy about this development...while simultaneously saddened at the need to sever ties with some old friends.One door opens and another door closes....to paraphrase an old saying.So circumstances have changed forcing me to make a declaration here...I am under consider
|
|
3/7/2009 8:18:03 PM |
|
$3000 Dollars for a rebuilt tranny....and that's not the worst of it.Seems a rebuilt tranny needs to be broken in before setting off on an extended trip.So here I am stuck in New york and all I want is to be back in North Carolina working on this new relationship...spending as much time as the lovely Domme will allow me.Life sucks,the moment something good comes into your life...you need to be taught some sort of patience lesson,bah bullshitLove Mike ....till next timep.s thats tranny as in transmission not as in life style choice...damm perverts.$3000 Dollars for a rebuilt tranny....and that's not the worst of it.Seems a rebuilt tranny ne
|
|
2/19/2009 8:35:03 PM |
|
Okay I've been on this site for a year and a half or so,lots of fun,good conversation and some interesting play dates.Now though I have entered into the most interesting and promising situation up till this point. Of course I will attempt to restrain my fanciful hopes for this r/t...but being a sub/slave type....I will allow these hopes to run away with my reason.All I keep saying to myself ...is DON'T FUCK THIS UP....Okay I've been on this site for a year and a half or so,lots of fun,good conversation and some
|
|
2/5/2009 2:45:26 PM |
|
Yesterday was just fantastic.Went to Fayetteville for an initial play/session with a beautiful and inventive Domme.As an extra added bonus a friend of hers came along....well these 2 lovely and talented Dommes had a fun filled afternoon putting me thru my paces....I hope they enjoyed themselves even half as much as I....if so surely I will be returning soon.Yesterday was just fantastic.Went to Fayetteville for an initial play/session with a beautiful
|
|
2/2/2009 6:50:06 PM |
|
Looks like i get to be used this w/e.On Sunday i am to be at the mercy of 2 Dommes only one of which i have actually met.Not to worry i have told a friend where i am going and who i am meeting.My initial meeting with this particular Domme left me impressed to no end by both Her capacity for sadism and Her apparent sanity.While i have no doubt i shall truly suffer i will be safe....Looks like i get to be used this w/e.On Sunday i am to be at the mercy of 2 Dommes only one of
|
|
2/1/2009 5:56:33 AM |
|
Got my hair cut today,now to have any idea how important this was ,you would of had to have seen my last haircut.Last got my hair cut while in New York by this young lady who had never previously cut my hair.Chop Chop....it was a disaster.The kind of cut that makes one consider murder each and every morning as you try to do something in the morning with it.Needed some growth before I could have it fixed and today was the day,after getting yelled at by the young lady who normally cuts my hair.....she proceeded to fix it and restore me to my dapper ways.Got my hair cut today,now to have any idea how important this was ,you would of had to have se
|
|
1/27/2009 9:02:02 AM |
|
Okay,after having last nights play canceled on me,I have decided to get a little bit more proactive.Tonight I will ,for the first time,attend La Fortress the local bdsm club and see whats what....Okay,after having last nights play canceled on me,I have decided to get a little bit more proa
|
|
1/25/2009 12:25:41 PM |
|
I am crushed,it seems thru a glitch in communications the Domme I was to play with Friday has cancelled.Claiming the void in correspondence led her to fear I was wasting her time she has made alternate plans.Why oh why are Dommes so fickle....fuck,I was so looking forward to some play.I am crushed,it seems thru a glitch in communications the Domme I was to play with Friday has
|
|
1/24/2009 8:29:35 AM |
|
Well at long last the opportunity to play has arrived.On Friday night i shall travel to Fayetteville for an initial play date with a lovely Sadist who promises to test the boundary's of my masochism....Yippie.Well at long last the opportunity to play has arrived.On Friday night i shall travel to Fayett
|
|
1/10/2009 1:54:26 PM |
|
Well at long last my extended trip home winds down.My son and I will drive to Washington Monday for the Inaugural ceremony....he shall return to New York on the 22nd via bus.My plans are to return to North Carolina absent the opportunity to meet others in the D.C. area...If you are going and would be interested in meeting please contact me....MikeWell at long last my extended trip home winds down.My son and I will drive to Washington Monda
|
|
12/26/2008 9:31:50 AM |
|
Season's Greeting to all,spendind my holidays in New York this year.As a consequence i haven't been posting much and for that I apologise.....hoping everyone's New Year is chock full of health merriment and Kink....love MikeSeason's Greeting to all,spendind my holidays in New York this year.As a consequence i haven't
|
|
11/6/2008 11:44:44 AM |
|
Well we went and done it....we as a nation elected the best man for the job.And considering the state of the Union,it is an immense job awaiting our new President.Congratulations America job well done Oh yeah,almost forgot.....he is a black man.A fact that has not gone unnoticed...lol.There have been of course the obligatory chords of discontent,many of them in my mind inspired by an undercurrent of racism.God Bless Barack Obama and God Bless The United States of America.Well we went and done it....we as a nation elected the best man for the job.And considering th
|
|
10/25/2008 1:17:39 PM |
|
It has been awhile since my last journal entry,other matters have monopolized my time.Life sucks,or at least my search for a Domme sucks....not that I haven't met some truly interesting and Dommley Woman,just that one thing or another make these unsuitable relationships .Distance,incompatibility or a number of other more mundane matters conspire to keep me searching.......and searching.All good though,for as previously stated,I am meeting some incredible people on this journey....not the One as of yet....but hope and a cheery outlook or still the order of the day...and keeps a smile on my faceIt has been awhile since my last journal entry,other matters have monopolized my time.Life suc
|
|
9/23/2008 6:35:02 PM |
|
Okay all I will be heading on a week long trip that will leave my access to the political threads somewhat limited....how I will survive I have no idea...going cold turkey like this might lead to a reaction....hopefully if I survive the sudden changes I shall return in a week...damm the vp debates....agggrhhhhhOkay all I will be heading on a week long trip that will leave my access to the political thre
|
|
8/29/2008 3:24:13 PM |
|
*Awaiting Approval*sucks...I am serving a 2 week long moderation time -out(sort of like corner time for big people)as a result of losing my cool on a thread.Well deserved,I lost it and I should have been able to cut the offending party up without drawing the censure of the mods.On a good day I would have done it in a surgical way and not even have left fingerprints.Alas it is done and it has taken most of the joy out of posting.Ahh maybe I will make more visits here.*Awaiting Approval*sucks...I am serving a 2 week long moderation time -out(sort of like corner
|
|
7/31/2008 3:49:57 PM |
|
This has of course become something more than a short story,something more than a tale of fiction.It has morphed into my tale of getting lost and than being made aware again.I will leave it up for a week or so and than delete,as I don't really think this is the place for it,but it is here and if you read it feel free to comment...I shall try to wrap it up with this entry............. When last we left Mike he had seemed to grow disenchanted politically,content to listen to the lies from Washington and if not blindly believe,he has to a great extant stopped caring.This in hindsight has not been strictly a political journey,but something that has happened to his whole life view His younger brothers early and painful death from leukemia,the dissolution of his marriage,revelations revealed from behind the fog of blocked memory concerning his childhood,all of this has conspired to turn him bitter and morose There has been one constant,one light that keeps him moving forward,even has he walks thru fog,his son whose very presence has already served to save Mike's life ,the life he had come to think of as too painful to make worth it.Life had hit him too often ,in reality all Mike wanted at this point was an end But on the way out the door,the ex-wife decides her new life does not require the presence of her son.Mike has found his anchor ,his reason for living,what was always the love of his life will not be taken from him,no indeed will become even more so ,his to raise and to love.They become a family of two,to be sure there were extended family members and loved ones,but they have first and foremost each other Mike the father shall be the parent,but will learn from the son .Michael is bright and smart with an easy smile that constantly shines light on Mike.Slowly Mike starts to notice the growth and maturity of Michael,a child to be sure,but somehow two steps ahead of the father all the same.Dissmisive of his father's politics of pragmatism,speaking with the voice of hope and idealism he scorns his father's recent votes.Questions how is father can vote for the empty hat in the White House,the father can not bring himself to vote for Kerry who has simply become another democrat felled by the politics of scorn and dismissal,charges scurrilous have been leveled.And so the vote goes for the ANG drunk,rather than the man who served...Mike has by now been long past disenchanted with this crew of theives,has watched odious laws be bullied thru The Patriot Act chief amongst them And all the while the son is growing ,speaking more and more in the voice of a young man,and sounding more and more familiar,the father can swear he has heard this voice before though he can not place it.He chides his son for his idealism ,he reminds the child to wait that life will prove to him some harsh lessons,pragmatism will replace idealism.And the son asks'why dad,is that what happened to you'.Yes son and it will happen to you someda..it is now clear the voice he can not place..it is his own,these are his beleif's,his arguments with his own dad. And now the son starts the second rebirth of the father,this one of a political bent.No less important,no less life reaffirming and no less appreciated.One name starts to be repeated early in 08...Obama .The father committed to righting his past mistake is prepared and ready to vote Hillary.Watches as his son becomes more and more vested in the Obama candidacy,warns his child that the political animal that is Hillary will be the party's nominee...Her machine is too well oiled ,too stocked with political pros'but the son keeps repeating 'Obama dad Obama'.Well we all know how that turned out don't we,once again the child was in front of the father.But dad is allright with that,as a matter of fact dad could not be prouder,the son's political passion has been a joy to watch.A snapshot of his own commited youth,a long past memory when life was fresh and hope was present in his dreams. So now the son is trying to talk the father into a Sept trip to Ohio. Volunteering in New York will not be enough for the son,New York will go Democratic in any event...Michael wants a battleground state...and I shall provide it,hoping all the while I can go with him..but one way or another the child shall go to the Ohio valley and do his part...The father ,whether from afar or not will smile and his heart will beat with pride....My son has become a new and improved version of my younger self...I hope life holds a better future for him....The end I think? This has of course become something more than a short story,something more than a tale of fict
|
|
7/31/2008 1:19:27 PM |
|
So now there is an idiot in the White House and Mike has cast his vote for this bumbling cowboy...but as of yet he has no reason to regret this.Mike's politics,though nominally Democratic has always been more centrist than party affiliation, White House and the country could use a tough guy to steer the ship a little to the right.To talk tough and plain to the bad actors of the world,a change from what Mike thought of as ineffective leadership and response to the U.S.S.Cole ,Mogadishu,Beirut and the attempt in 93 to bring down the towers Mike is heartened at the thought of the tough talking cowboy and his team of neo-cons,surely the world realises a new American day has dawned...the Republicans play country hardball,not constrained in the least be the niceties of diplomacy...things will be better just you wait Sept.11th 2011 as nice a day as fall can get ,the northeast,bright clear and sunny.... nothing will be the same by the time the sun sets,none of us unaffected by the dark happenings of this day.Seems despite the tough cowboys presence in the White House ,and somewhat as a legacy of the previous administration America's intelligence and law-enforcement community has been asleep.Walking amongst us,training amongst us planning their infamous act amongst us has been a group of fanatics,and no one notices..no attention is paid despite warnings and alerts...the intelligence community is aware of a spike in traffic(communications)alluding to a major event on American soil.The law enforcement community has recieved reports of young Islamic men interested in flight instruction,only they don't seem to have much interest in how to land these flying behemoths...no they would just like to know how to steer and maintain adjust altitude..put these two disparate but connected facts together ,look hard at them...sept 11'th 2001 is just the day preceding the 12th of sept...ah but intelligence does not talk to law enforcement and vice verse..the failure is criminal to say the least and will have dire circumstances for America indeed for the world itself We all know what happens early morning Sept 11,we shall never forget.Our hero at the time is operating a Car Wash on sunrise Highway in Suffolk Co. a suburb of New York..he first becomes aware of a deathly silence,Sunrise Highway a busy thoroughfare is quiet,all seems to be quiet...and than the phone call,'mike get to a TV' 'mike you might has well close the shop'' nothing is happening today'. Eventually our hero does get to a TV in time to see loop after loop of planes flying into the buildings...and to his horror in time to see first one than the other crumble and fall,as the buildings crumble so goes his spirit.What kind of evil could possibly perpetrate such an act ,and how does that evil come here. New York City one of the Worlds greatest city has now suffered a terrorist attack.The name Osama bin Laden is now becoming familiar to all Americans...a face has been attached to this evil...and lower Manhattan still smolders.A great city still walks in fog and tries to cope with it's new status has the place where the greatest terrorist attack has taken place,no longer home of Broadway and The Met or The American Museum of Natural History,it is now the city where the buildings fell. Now the cowboy in Office seems like a pretty good choice,no obfuscating no seeking a consensus of opinion,Mikes country will no doubt hunt down those responsible and they will pay,of this Mike has no doubt....for there can be no doubt,this is the way of things.Mike is a typical American and his sense of justice of the balancing of the books demands this,has it not always been so As the pile smolders our cowboy President comes to ground zero and pronounces to the world that those responsible will be brought to justice...and the world cheered.Mike cried and his heart beat with pride.Enlistment soared American boys signed up in droves,there country had been attacked and they like generations of boys before them would answer the call Afghanistan ,the Taliban these are names that would become as familiar as Guadalcanal and Iwo Jima ,Berlin and the Bulge...a new American patriotism swept the land..and the corridors of power the world over stood with us.Our Cowboy President ,he who Mike was so glad was at the helm,he took all that opportunity and squandered it ,just like he and his administration would squander the lives of so many of those boys that lined up to join As Mike watched bewildered the Afghan mission,the mission to get bin Laden somehow become's a sideshow..Speeches were made an Axis of evil identified and slowly but surely America's attention was diverted.Diverted from those that had attacked us to one who had merely defied us.Iraq became the focus of the Administration no more than regional despot was somehow elevated to a threat to all mankind.America had squandered her chance ,spent her goodwill and cashed in her chit with the world.We would now remake the world in the image deemed appropriate by the cowboy and his cronies,and slowly allies stepped back and than away.Nation Building was the order of the day,instead of justice we would ,as a nation ,try to impose a new world order from the chaos of the old...And we would be led by the cowboy and his bumbling team Mike meanwhile ,growing increasingly frustrated with the inability of his country to get bin Ladin is subject to all the propaganda spoon fed all the lies and is sated with the blood lust of his leaders...Shock and Awe.statues being pulled down...Mission accomplished all so positive and promising All this time there is a voice that won't be silenced , a voice that sounds eerily familiar to Mike,it is the sound of his son a young man just becoming aware,liberal as youth is prone to be ,questioning and doubtful of authority as all should be ,whispering doubts in his father's ear at all times and asking questions the father can not answer and is uncomfortable with being asked.But something about this voice he has heard before he can not put his finger on it ,but the tone the view it is tugging at Mike.....more later apologies for the length..... So now there is an idiot in the White House and Mike has cast his vote for this b
|
|
7/31/2008 8:42:19 AM |
|
And so we pick up our tale...The election comes and the former Gov. is now President, morality questions continue to dog him and the new First Lady...there is travelgate,whitewater and Rock Creek Park a suicide followed by a hasty purging of the dead man's office.The purger none other than the First Lady(leading to speculation of an affair or *gasp*actual involvement in the man's demise.Such rumors remain pure speculation.But our hero(Mike remember?)is increasingly bitter,the promised morality seems like same old,same old.Mike is increasingly growing disenchanted with all things Clinton....and has yet to even hear the name Monica Fast forward to the wind down to the Clinton years he has withstood an impeachment hearing,has actually tried to parse the word 'it' and after pointing his finger at the American people and swearing that 'he never had sex with that woman'...now states it would depend what your definition of sex is...apparently Slick Willie doesnt believe a blow job in the Oval Office constitutes sex.. Things have gotten so bad and so polarising that his V.P. distances himself from The President ,does not want to be further stained by his legacy Our hero meanwhile has had to reinvent himself his marriage is a thing of the past.He is a single parent now and disillusioned to say the least.His choices seem stark,vote for the 'inventor of the Internet'or the Gov. of Texas a man who it would seem is challenged by his native language....Mike can not stand Gore,has an almost visceral reaction to him and his wife(warning labels on albums) Now Gov.Bush is a tough talking self styled cowboy(raised in Maine and D.C.,graduate of Yale(how?)former owner of the Texas Rangers Baseball team...and it would appear an idiot..Mike had been hoping the Republicans would nominate Sen.McCain a man he could have been proud to vote for.But Mr.Bush's campaign manager had something on McCain it would seem,the Sen. folded up his tent,rolled over and played dead...We all would learn later of Karl Rove,the campaign manager and his quest for a permanent Republican power base,wherein they would become the predominant party in American politics with the Dems playing the role of the loyal opposition....But none of this is known come election day...so our bitter disillusioned hero goes to the polls and cast's a vote for the Republican candidate from the great state of Texas.....more later And so we pick up our tale...The election comes and the former Gov. is now President, morality
|
|
7/31/2008 5:28:58 AM |
|
As promised a short story We begin our story during primary season in the run-up to the 1992 Presidential Election,this is after all where all the trouble started It was at that time when a man from Arkansas sought his party's nomination ,he and his wife(who will play a central role in this presidency and our story)come from their small southern state promising a new morality and a new way of doing business in Washington.He is soon dubbed Slick Willie a nickname truly earned,a politician of rare talents though as it turns out questionable morals Our hero in this tale is an average liberal sort of guy,who is entering his mid thirties seemingly firmly entrenched in his middle -class status.Home owner married father of one,who though holding a good job and combined with the income of his wife(also a good job)wonders how his ends don't allways meet.He has been pleased with recent developments the Reagan Years were good the Wall came tumbling down ,the Soviet Union has crumbled under it's own weight,it is a proud thing once again to be an American(though our hero has always been proud,it did seem the country had entered a morose period)The first Bush followed Reagan and things did not seem bad,though he stumbles badly with the tag line'read my lips no new taxes'a promise he can't keep The Democrats after an interesting primary in which the contenders fall by the wayside nominate the morally challenged Gov.of Arkansas.ths after repeated scandals involving trashy females.the candidate's wife manages to insult a female country singer stating she isn't some Tammy Wynette standing by her man...it is an unseemly position and a disgraceful sideshow that greatly disturbs our hero a man we will call simply Mike As previously stated Mike is a proud American and greatly distressed by the image of a candidate and his wife being interviewed discussing one affair after another on national TV it disturbs his sense of propriety(not to mention his unease over his own marriage)starts to identify as a Republican,repudiating a lifetime of liberal Democratic party beliefs..our hero doesn't even realise he is sliding closer to the beliefs of his long detested father...more to come...As promised a short story We begin our story during primary season in the run-up to the
|
|
7/30/2008 9:59:34 AM |
|
Anyone who has been here for awhile and reads the threads on the Ask a Mistress forum is very familiar with the questions asked about pro's.Why are they here,can we get rid of them yada yada yada.My usual take on this is live and let live...not what I'm looking for,but I really don't care..so with all that said..let me tell you a little story...The other day I checked the who's viewing me? box and found a young lady had stopped by..so as is my habit I checked her profile..she is a financial,cyber Domme...okay I write a nice letter thanking her for stopping by,explaining that I am not into these things and wishing her a nice journey...I will cut and paste her return letter... Fuck off cheapskate!Now I ask you ,is this any way for a young lady to talk....oh well another fan in my column...yippie well on to new business..my next journal entry will be an attempt at fictional writing...I will tell the wholly fictitious account of a quasi-liberal seduced by the dark side and making the mistake not once but twice of voting for bushie enjoy the story and lets see how it works out.... Anyone who has been here for awhile and reads the threads on the Ask a Mistress forum is very
|
|
7/26/2008 3:42:05 AM |
|
Personal growth is a bitch...to achieve this laudable goal one usually has to waddle through some shit...and more times than not experience shows some pain will attend the journey.Well nothing ventured ,nothing gained so I waddle along Meanwhile the search continues,I feel like I've been alone forever and my ache to find someone to walk with(or behind,as the case may be)is acute.This isn't necessarily a play partner,though I don't rule this out,nothing wrong with play, this is a yearning for a life partner,no matter the particulars of the dynamic... Personal growth is a bitch...to achieve this laudable goal one usually has to waddle through s
|
|
7/19/2008 10:18:10 AM |
|
We are getting hammered here in the tringle area,thunderstorms and lightning,one ground strike has knocked out tv and the internet signal(right now i am reduced to plucking the signal from one of my neigbors)No repair till late tomorrow afternoon....frustrating to say the least....We are getting hammered here in the tringle area,thunderstorms and lightning,one ground strike
|
|
7/15/2008 5:13:48 AM |
|
Last journal entry was deleted for intemperance:In a recent thread the subject of music came up,a certain former aviator had referenced Britney Spears...I could not resist,what was a man of his years was doing listening to her,I suggested he acquire some age-appropriate taste and mentioned Sinatra.His reply,that he wasn't trying to score with aging Italian men....now I am as enamored with 'scoring'as the next man but for me Britney would be a hard limit...very hard,but to each his own.till next timeLast journal entry was deleted for intemperance:In a recent thread the subject of music came u
|
|
7/11/2008 12:16:39 PM |
|
Are the CM mailman on strike....my mailbox has been suspiciously quiet of late.Now i know what your thinking what a runaway ego going on here...not at all,simply a case of a totally available sub/type highly desirable,yet receiving no mail...something must be wrong with the delivery system...right?Are the CM mailman on strike....my mailbox has been suspiciously quiet of late.Now i know what
|
|
7/10/2008 1:12:51 PM |
|
So the airport runs have been made,no more out of state visitors...finally peace in the land...interesting goings -on with my 13 y/o niece and her 14?y/o boyfriend....now I am wondering how many that read this will be bothered by that simple statement..What is a 13 y/o doing dating is how i would be reacting.A little back-story if you will..I am serving multiple purposes down here..I am completing my recovery from surgery,I am living on the cheap so to speak(compared to NY)thus allowing me to help my son in a much bigger way get thru NYU...and lastly I am 'helping'with 2 children who have no father in their life...helping that is as much as the mother,my sister,will allow.Now she and I don't agree on much,this is a case of not being able to choose family(I love her dearly,not sure if I like her)Young teen girls dating young teen boys is one of these things we disagree on.My sister for some reason see's it as cute,a young well-mannered southern boy who calls her Ma'am and generally acts like a young gentleman...well this former young boy aint buying it,I could do the two-step for an unsuspecting parent with the best of them. Well yesterday the young lady gets a text message from the young boy...while we all sit in a restaurant to boot...a dear jane so to speak and with all the tact young boys are known for...so we now have a broken hearted little girl on our hands...and a livid mother...who thinks her best course of action is to go confront the boys mother with the evidence of the text-message.Can you imagine the terror the young girl feels at this prospect ,her mother ranting and raving at what is in essence a school-mates mom.The bus rides when school re-starts would be hell for her fortunately between the pleadings of my niece and my advice to worry about raising her own kids and let other's worry about theirs ,disaster was for the moment averted...I completed my surrogate dad gig by...till next time basically telling my niece of the difference's between young girls and young boys(the boys ,and i should know i used to be one are stupid)she will be alright till the next time some little boy breaks her little heart So the airport runs have been made,no more out of state visitors...finally peace in the land..
|
|
7/8/2008 6:32:56 PM |
|
So here I am just Your normal sub/slave type,who has had the good fortune to make contact with a good number of people on here,and not just in the pursuit of a r/t,i have made friends from both sides of the equation tops/bots and in-between of both genders...when I sign on and the little red 'new messages' is lit ,I look forward to seeing which of the many friends might be sending me a letter...now here is where I get ticked off the unsolicited and obvious with screwed up syntax and all asking me to 'hit them up' at such and such yahoo...and here is the real kicker 9 out of 10 of these are sub woman offering to serve me on their knees from now to kingdom come(actually went to the trouble of explaining to one of these twits that we would only wind up with headaches due to banging our heads together...ya know both on our knees sort of thing...she didn't get it either so don't worry if You didn't)my handle is slvemike4u is it actually necessary to read my profile to know i'm a sub type sheesh if Your going to make your living scamming people at least put some effort into it....anything worth doing and all that...till next time i get a hair up my ass...bye So here I am just Your normal sub/slave type,who has had the good fortune to make contact with
|
|
7/7/2008 8:07:55 PM |
|
There is a thread currently running on the boards concerning the assertion by a financial advisor of McCain's(Gramm)that we are not in a recession,rather we are a nation of whiners...all good so far..a young Lady in support of this states in a post that it is all about Americans wanting bigger houses ,more cars, to eat-out as opposed to in, and the biggie more plastic surgery..arghhhhh I could have died right their...this is a thread that has moved the discussion from ,are their people hurting to the voices of those who say if they are it's their own fault,(they should have made better decisions sort of thing)and this woman-child ascribes the whole thing to Americans having too many tummy-tucks....this can not be an example of an American education or we are all screwedThere is a thread currently running on the boards concerning the assertion by a financial advi
|
|
7/5/2008 4:01:59 AM |
|
Seems one of CollarMe's newest members has stirred up a bit of trouble on the forums.She had the audacity to request that any correspondence with her begin with a simple phrase 'Stacy is the boss'...seems simple enough does it not...in a l/s where we regularly discuss otherwise straight men being coerced,seduced or required to perform such acts as Blow jobs and eating of creampies...this got people in an uproar 'how dare she require men to prove they read her profile by starting off with this offensive indication of their willingness to submit' well that's what these complaints sounded like to me anyway...a tempest in a teapot to be sure The Young Lady stirs passions and not just amongst the sub/slave types, more than a few Dommes came out to hammer her with something akin to the old 'one twue wayy' bullshit.She is Young and Beautiful and apparently has the nerve to have already actualized her Feminine Power...maybe at too early an age for some ?Seems one of CollarMe's newest members has stirred up a bit of trouble on the forums.She had t
|
|
7/4/2008 3:59:11 PM |
|
Okay so some of You know I'm a recent transplant from New York to North Carolina...well so's my dog .She's a 7 Y/o mixed breed named snuggles ,now rest assured I did not name her,that was done by my thaen 6 y/o niece...well back to the story ,we had weather in NY but not like You get down here,well I may get a kick out of the great storms they scare the shit out of her....you would think the dog never lived thru a nor'easter(several)..so she gets all scared while I was walking her tonight,trying to beat a storm I could see coming...we get out on the road and the storm just moves rght in on us and fast one minute a threatening sky ...the next just black ...wind picking up...and the dog bolts for home swear to god she wanted me to jog home...we get in the door and her act is the same every storm she wants to go upstairs,now you have to understand she let me know soon after our arrival she did not like this narrow staircase...she doesn't go up the stairs except for ina storm she will go up and I have to go with her and calm her down ...of course the only thing she accomplishes by going upstairs is to get closer to the storm....Okay so some of You know I'm a recent transplant from New York to North Carolina...well so's m
|
|
7/4/2008 2:48:23 PM |
|
It seems that more than a few are actually reading this ,if letters I get are any indication .Now when I come here and would like to just free flow some thoughts I find myself worrying about the interest level of the audience....This will probably affect the quality of the writing and before You know it I will be recieving comments of a different sort in my CM mailbox.Gone are the days of carefree posting ,welcome to the brave new world where everything I write will be self censored and You all have Yourselves to blame...wasn't it enough You were reading it did You have to let me know about it....it will never be the same again....till next timeIt seems that more than a few are actually reading this ,if letters I get are any indication .
|
|
7/1/2008 8:43:06 PM |
|
its almost 3:00 am and the kids leave tomorrow,if we were talking just any collection of kids , no problem but we are talking about my son and assorted nieces and nephews which means in the long run all I want to do is keep them here.It's amazing they crimp my social life make me be more aware of behavior and l/s issues I don't even normally aknowledge, yet it's time for them to leave I'm upset....one would think I would be tickled pink...whoppee I can get back to my own ways...well in truth I would make any adjustments to keep my son in my life daily...it's his life that doesn't have room for me anymore...and thats how it should beits almost 3:00 am and the kids leave tomorrow,if we were talking just any collection of kids
|
|
7/1/2008 7:36:46 AM |
|
Okay just a little venting here,my niece,nephew and son drive 550 miles to see,respectfully their grandmother,mother,aunt and in my sons case father for the weekend.They arrive early friday morning to a house desperately in need of some shopping.Now this isn't a money issue,times are hard but we can still afford food,still someone has to go do something ,some shopping.Well my older sister mother to the niece aunt to the nephews nominal hostess to this whole get-together,decides her day is better spent sitting around the community pool swigging beer all day. Off me and my mother go shopping,fill the house with all the goodies the kids like and neccesities for the weekend.Come home and I cook a dinner,the only appearence my sister makes is to refill her cooler with more beer(gotten bt the way when we shopped).Night falls I am enjoying my son's company not to mention my niece and nephew.We start playing a friendly little game of Texas hold em.Still sister is at the pool.She has in addidtion to the eldest daughter that drove down another 12 y/o daughter and a 11 y/o son,both come in the house at seperate times with seperate reports of their mothers condition at the pool.By now I am seething,want nothing more than to put my foot up my sisters ass,but the calm and serene side of me really doesn't give a shit,I have spent and will continue to spend has much time as possible with my son on his visit...moving right along we're playing cards when the lush comes home ,but she's not alone she has brought the neighborhood drunks home for a dip in the hot tub.Sister in her drunkeness goes and dumps the whole bottle of chlorine in the hot tub(still can't sit out in the back without getting choked by the smell of chlorine)Funniest part to all this is my niece brought a new boyfriend down here to meet her mother...I hope she marries the guy just so my sister can live with this story for the rest of her life..Okay just a little venting here,my niece,nephew and son drive 550 miles to see,respectfully th
|
|
6/30/2008 12:48:02 AM |
|
The kids arrived this morning at 5:30 after their long drive thru the night.Now the celebration can commence(after a couple of hours sleep for the travelers)HAPPY 4TH OF JULY TO ALL ...hope everybody has a safe and festive day especially those presently serving and in harms way...God Bless and ThankYouThe kids arrived this morning at 5:30 after their long drive thru the night.Now the celebratio
|
|
6/28/2008 4:59:44 PM |
|
It was sweet indeed to wake up in my own bed and allow the day to happen ,rather than trying to squeeze a zillion things into a long weekend.Than the phone calls from New York started,my niece who is driving her car down is arguing with my nephew,who doesn't believe he should have to chip in for expenses since the car is coming down anyway...go figure she is 23 he is 20...I told her they can figure this out themselves I didn't want to touch this argument...the next phone call informs me that one of my nephews objections is his knowledge that I will be paying my son's contribution(my son is a college student who works part time for his own pocket money,the other two hold full time jobs)This is all so childish and I guess completly fitting considering these are still children....I still want no part of adjudicating there negotiations...its a lose-lose situation for an uncle(but between me and you my cheap ass nephew should just chip in and not worry so much about where my son's contribution is coming from or if that bothers him so much he should talk to my sister and brother-in-law maybe they will subsidize his trip..good luck with that)till next timeIt was sweet indeed to wake up in my own bed and allow the day to happen ,rather than trying t
|
|
6/27/2008 5:41:27 PM |
|
Well I have returned from my weekend trip to the only place I have ever thought of has home,New York City,land of my birth and home (still) to my son.Funny thing though I couldn't wait to get there,a few short days later I couldn't wait to leave.The shorter my intended stay is,the more intense the trip.There is my son,then the nieces and nephews ,sister and brother-in-law.Friends that I have carried since junior high...all with their own claim on my time and none of them would I not want to see and spend time with.These people are my touchstones and know me better than I know myself.Yet it would seem somehow my peace is no longer to be found in New York,the settled feeling of being home now comes in a little town called Clayton N.C. the rhythm of the place suits me better,the people I have met here I long to know better(hopefully there is a Lady in Asheville who will allow me that pleasure).So tonight I go to sleep in my own bed and tomorrow I will wake up and walk my dog than go get a cup of coffee at my local Starbucks and all will be good....Well I have returned from my weekend trip to the only place I have ever thought of has home,Ne
|
|
6/22/2008 5:59:53 PM |
|
So off i go on a long weekend in the only city in the world that really matters New York City,a weekend of debauchery and excess,followed by an injection in my spine.The real impetus for the trip is a Doctor's appointment to receive an epidural injection...the fun and mayhem attending whenever I go home is just an extra added bonus...hell I even get to see my son so it's a win win situation...if only it wasn't for that pesky large bore needle in the base of my neck...oh well a little pains a good thing right...So off i go on a long weekend in the only city in the world that really matters New York City,
|
|
6/12/2008 8:09:32 AM |
|
Well Fathers day played out much as I expected.Might be it was a case of self-fulfilling karma or something,it all started with a phone call recieved while just stretching myself awake in bed.....have You ever put Your foot so far down Your throat You realise You will never again, short of a medical procedure duplicate this,....well I have ...I answer the phone say hello and am immediately lost who I'm talking to...Okay this can happen right...The charming Lady in question decides to let me off the hook and clear up my confusion...tells me who I am talking ,You would think that's all cleared up ,well not so fast she told me her name I heard a similar name and started having the conversation again ...Still talking under a mistaken impression as to whom I'm talking...we end the conversation I walk my dog and I'm thinking wait a minute the Lady I thought I was talking to doesn't to my knowledge have my tell #...WTF get back and my caller has sent me a CM mail advising me of the fact that she believes I still didn't know who'm I was talking to....Love proving to someone just how big an ass I can be...better than letting them guess IMO....so the day continues so I go to Starbucks to get my morning coffee(which if I had had before phone call I like to think I wouldn't have been so stupid)but wait where's my Sunday Times...no Sunday Times they were all stolen according to the staff at Starbucks?...okay go home and grab my nephew whom I'm taking to the movies in lieu of my own son who I am missing terribly...in a rush I spill the whole big Venti coffee all over the rug okay clean this up hurry Your in a rush need to leave early for the movies so i can drive 20 miles out of my way ,not just for more coffee ,but an attempt to find the Times in a alternate Starbucks....Get to the second Starbucks ...wait for it ....no Times...but there at a table is a woman reading the Times and in my heart of hearts I just know she will sit there read and than stick it back in the rack ...but this does me no good I have a young man waiting to see the Incredible Hulk...so I get my coffee and head off to the movies...knowing all I really want to do is crawl back into bed and hide from the rest of this day.....BTW the movie was good...the rest of the day so so I will not bore You with the rest of it....all I will say is Thank God it's Monday...till next time...mike Well Fathers day played out much as I expected.Might be it was a case of self-fulfilling karma
|
|
6/10/2008 3:39:58 PM |
|
So I'm sitting here in bumfuck N.C. watching the U.S. Open ,having watched the Russert coverage a large part of which dealt with his relationship with his father and in turn his own son,sounds good right,nothing to do but watch T.V. who's got it better than me.Well I'll tell You my heart is breaking all I can think of is for the first time in my life I will not be with my son on Fathers Day....You would think a masochist such as myself would know how to handle pain,not this way ,not this pain...I feel like an open sore and I don't know what to do ...He is in New York and if I could I would get in the car right now ...that is not an option for a number of reasons ,chiefly it doesn't make sense ...he will call and talk to me he loves me I love him and we will be allright we can and will survive this but damm it hurts....he is the best of me ,what makes me feel okay about myself and to not spend the day with him is hell itself...The U.S. Open on Sunday means Fathers Day...and it is usually one of my favorite times ...tomorrow it will just be pain....So I'm sitting here in bumfuck N.C. watching the U.S. Open ,having watched the Russert coverag
|
|
6/2/2008 12:48:34 PM |
|
Just had an amazing experiance with a domme (a new transplant from virginia)who has exchanged some messages with me,Usually short and abrupt,anyway in the course of talking she asked for my im on yahoo i gave it to her.Some more back and forth on one of which she accused me of standing her up 3 times.Later she admitted it was her confusion(someone else apparently is very smart)no apology something about being a domme means she should be bitchy.Anyway today i log on and find a IM in which she demands a aquire a hotel room for her sister tonight this is at 5:00 pm(when i read the message,don't know when she sent it)I im back no can do....get a nasty response telling me i'm aloser and not a real slave yada,yada,yada...is it me or shouldn't two people meet before uberbitch comes out and starts making demandsJust had an amazing experiance with a domme (a new transplant from virginia)who has exchanged
|
|
4/22/2008 1:37:00 PM |
|
Finally my new pictures have been approved,i believe they are a vast improvement on the webcam pictures I had up.Thank's to the exquisite Domme who was kind enough to take and send me some decent digital shots...well for better or worse there they are...Finally my new pictures have been approved,i believe they are a vast improvement on the webcam
|
|
4/15/2008 8:29:55 PM |
|
My 19 year old son,a sophomore at NYU (Deans list double Major in the film school)performed Fri.night in Manhatten with The NYU improv team.The show was hilarious and i couldn't have been prouder.I'm blessed to have a great relationship with my son,being a single parent ,raising him alone wasn't exactly the way i pictured doing it ,but looking back on it we have forged a bond that is truly special.My 19 year old son,a sophomore at NYU (Deans list double Major in the film school)performed Fr
|
|
4/11/2008 4:48:37 PM |
|
Had a lovely evening in Asheville Friday.All thanks to a charming though sadistic Domme,who managed to be be both warm and sensitive while blistering my ass and thighs.The evening started with alovely dinner,great conversation and an engaging smile that relaxed and disarmed me,making all that followed possible.Truly a woman of many talents and charm.....the best part of the evening was hearing the Lady express an interest in doing it again....how lucky can one boy get.....Had a lovely evening in Asheville Friday.All thanks to a charming though sadistic Domme,who ma
|
|
4/5/2008 3:30:00 PM |
|
Haven't had much to say in the journal dep. lately.Been very involved setting up a first meeting with an exceedingly interesting Domme,who for some reason has expressed an interest in meeting me.Your guess is as good as mine(what is this Lady thinking?).Will post, with the Lady's permission,how it turns out....Haven't had much to say in the journal dep. lately.Been very involved setting up a first meeti
|
|
3/28/2008 3:21:09 PM |
|
April Fools Day to all and may all your tricks and pranks lead to merriment and mirth and no real harm....everybody loves a clown...though some do have clown issues....whatever.....April Fools Day to all and may all your tricks and pranks lead to merriment and mir
|
|
3/24/2008 2:15:02 PM |
|
Just had a really scary experience in the chat rooms.Was invited thru a collarme message to join the new dominant woman chatroom,okay being the obediant submissive i am i join.When i get there i find 20 mistresses 1/2 dozen subs all firing comments back and forth.Whether it's my age or typing skills i didn't have a chance in hell to keep up.So naturally i slinked away with my tail between my legs...how embarassing.....Just had a really scary experience in the chat rooms.Was invited thru a collarme message to jo
|
|
3/23/2008 5:07:38 PM |
|
Well it has been a couple of days don't really have anything to add.Wish i could put down this computer and finish the book i'm reading,problem is the book sucks(Evil Inc.by Glen Kaplan) if i could finish this shit book though I have a new biography of Lincoln(President Lincoln The Duty of a Statesmen)never tire reading of this great man's lifeWell it has been a couple of days don't really have anything to add.Wish i could put down this
|
|
3/17/2008 11:01:52 AM |
|
If You have read this far and Your still here i have a confession and a favor to ask.Confession first in my just redone profile i laid claim to being a fully functioning adult with the requisite skills that would imply.Apparently thats not true strictly speaking,it seems i can't balance a checkbook,and in addition fail to notice as large sums of money fly out of my bank due to this shortcoming of mine.An obscene amount of money has been irretrievably lost in the year to date(my son away at college has access to this account and as such i lose track sometimes) to overdraft charges on this particular account.Now for the favor would anybody in the local area(clayton n.c.) or at least not too far from here, be interested in administering a sound thrashing , a no strings beating that would serve to remind me in the future of my responsibility's and at the same time punish me for the past carelessness.Taking care of my finances is something I usually have no problem doing and it would seem i have taken it for granted .Admittedly it is not an ideal situation with my son having an ATM card and free access to the account and i will do something about that when i go back to see him in New York....but as i said i would like to suffer some correction I am after all a masochist and just maybe there's a sadist out there who would like to get some exercise.... If You have read this far and Your still here i have a confession and a favor to ask.Confessio
|
|
3/17/2008 5:57:54 AM |
|
Have redone my profile again,soon i am going to start numbering them(edition 12?)Sure hope people actually read them.Trying to describe oneself on these things is sort of like some painful therapy exercize,introspection 101.Tried to keep the kinks and perversions out of this profile,I mean why bother being on the site and the list of interest's pretty much paint that picture ,in case the point is missed though here goes I AM ONE SICK TWISTED SUBMISSIVE MALE.Totally subservient to the right female and willing to allow her to expand my perversions (not an easy trick considering just how far they have already been stretched)Have redone my profile again,soon i am going to start numbering them(edition 12?)Sure hope peo
|
|
3/13/2008 9:24:42 AM |
|
From a son of IRELAND (2 generations removed but all Irish)happy ST.PATRICK'S DAY and may the luck of the Irish be with you all ,even those not fortunate enough to actually be Irish...and finally may you all be in heaven three hours before the devil knows your dead(old Irish blessing)From a son of IRELAND (2 generations removed but all Irish)happy ST.PATRICK'S DAY and may
|
|
3/10/2008 6:55:48 PM |
|
Since coming to north carolina everything's been real quiet .I know they have kink down here i've actually seen profiles from here,maybe no one wants to talk to someone passing thru even for an extended stay....oh well i'll be back in n.y. in mid april (maybe)till than the forums are still all sorts of fun.Just between me and you when i was young i was known to argue positions and spew garbage i didn't believe just to keep things going and to get under people's skin.things aren't all that different today.A kewpie doll to the first person who catches me switching sides in the middle of a postSince coming to north carolina everything's been real quiet .I know they have kink down here i
|
|
3/10/2008 9:44:54 AM |
|
In my continuing attempt to improve my self as a sub/slave,and take this out of the bedroom and move it to more of a lifestyle dynamic I have registered for a slave training weekend @ the master/slave training academy(found their link in one of the forum posts)The training weekend is set for may 29th will let you know how much help it is when i get back .In my continuing attempt to improve my self as a sub/slave,and take this out of the bedroom an
|
|
3/7/2008 6:13:47 PM |
|
screwed up again with the pictures.Always hated the one up as my primary tried to delete it and now there all blocked till new one gets approved....redid my profile ...still don't think i expressed myself and who i am what i'm seeking yada yada yada...maybe i'll peruse some other male subs profiles see how everyone else does it....screwed up again with the pictures.Always hated the one up as my primary tried to delete it an
|
|
3/2/2008 2:20:53 AM |
|
North Carolina is awfully quiet might, think i marched down here with the Army of the Potomac.If any one knows of any scene events/party's taking place down here please let me knowNorth Carolina is awfully quiet might, think i marched down here with the Army of the Potomac.
|
|
2/28/2008 9:46:46 AM |
|
So one in the afternoon on sunday i decide my trip to north car. can't be put off any longer.By 2 i'm on the road arrive i n clayton at 12:30 sun.night sore and tired...the ride seesms to get longer every time I make the trip...the only saving grace is my stop in Balt.@ the waterfront..a nice dinner a drink and back on the interstate....so let's see how they play south of the mason-dixon line...So one in the afternoon on sunday i decide my trip to north car. can't be put off any longer.B
|
|
2/24/2008 9:28:51 AM |
|
Family concerns compel me to temporarily relocate to North Carolina,lets call it an extended visit.I won't mind riding out the rest of a dreary winter in the south where i can expect an early spring.Will miss all in the northeast tho including those i had been talking to and discussing meeting.New York allways pulls me back i wont be able to stay away to long.....Family concerns compel me to temporarily relocate to North Carolina,lets call it an extended v
|
|
2/21/2008 4:32:41 AM |
|
Three weeks cig free and it's my birthday,at this point i wouldn't mind slowing them down a little ,but they keep coming.Once a year like clockwork....oh well if your not getting older your DEADThree weeks cig free and it's my birthday,at this point i wouldn't mind slowing them dow
|
|
2/17/2008 11:08:40 AM |
|
I would really like to express my gratitude to all who have sent me message's of encouragement and well wishes concerning my efforts to quit smoking.I can not tell you how much it has meant to me to recieve these positive and warm messages from total 'strangers' all i can say is THANK YOU for all the help and incentive how can i lose with all of you people behind me...mikeI would really like to express my gratitude to all who have sent me message's of encouragement
|
|
2/14/2008 10:21:05 AM |
|
Two weeks no cigs...having a surprisingly easy time of it,save a couple of overreactions to being cit off in traffic i've been my usual even-tempered soul.not declaring a victory here but i feel good about it and think i might make it.Strictly speaking of mind-set, for the first time in 30 years i can envision a smoke free lifestyle.Have to give my son a lot of the credit for busting my balls on a regular basis for the last year or so simply put i wouldn't have even tried if he hadn't put so much pressure on me.....slave mikeTwo weeks no cigs...having a surprisingly easy time of it,save a couple of overreactions to be
|
|
2/12/2008 5:05:02 AM |
|
12 days no cigarettes ..going fine so far i've stopped wearing the patch and am now relying soley on CHANTIX and the encouragement of loved ones(my 19 y/o son is a real ballbuster:)after 30years of smoking if i can do this proves anyone can lets put the tobacco companies out of business....12 days no cigarettes ..going fine so far i've stopped wearing the patch and am now relying so
|
|
2/11/2008 5:15:12 AM |
|
I believe i finally understand the major flaw in my thinking when dealing with 'DOMMES' that i correspond with here,that being i assume they are what they say they are.As a believer in the natural superiority of the female i grant all the status of DOMME.This is my mistake not all have actualised thier power and as such while they deserve respect(as all woman do) they are not DOMMES in the true sense of the word and certainly not my DOMME....putting up a profile saying your this or saying your that is a good beginning but that is all it is a beginning the final word is earning that tittle whether it be DOMME or slave from another....slave mikeI believe i finally understand the major flaw in my thinking when dealing with 'DOMMES' that i
|
|
2/10/2008 6:54:46 PM |
|
i don't understand the reaction i'm getting concerning my last post.seems to some a DOMME demanding total control of a sub before even meeting him is not an unheard of demand.i thought of acceding to this requirement before the little voice in my head started screaming at me all the ways this was wrong.control and submission of this level is not something i could give to a virtual stranger but instead a gift i would offer to the DOMME i want tspend the rest of my life serving....slave mikei don't understand the reaction i'm getting concerning my last post.seems to some a DOMME dema
|
|
2/10/2008 3:15:52 PM |
|
so my stomach got kicked in again.Spent the last week talking to a Domme about a LTR and the parameters of such an arrangement.Chastity was talked about as an eventual goal I was alright with the schedule .We were going to meet today.She let me know this evening that the only way this would work for her, would be me agreeing to enter into lockdown chastity tonight,this demand made prior to actually meeting.I told her i couldn't possibly agree to this till some trust had been established.She decided no and wished me luck..please let me know is there anyway i should have acceeded to what to me was a completely out of left field request and totally in conflict with everything that was agreed to prior to thi evening.....slave if anyone will have me mikeso my stomach got kicked in again.Spent the last week talking to a Domme about a LTR and the p
|
|
2/10/2008 9:55:43 AM |
|
Thought i might meet a Mistress i have been in touch with today.Don't know if that will come to pass as the day is slipping away.Trying not to invest too heavily before meeting this time,as it seems that is a recipe for depression:)Keeping both my feet on the ground might turn in to full time job as i tend to get hopeful at every opportunity oh well that is who i am and it's a little late to change now slave mikeThought i might meet a Mistress i have been in touch with today.Don't know if that will come t
|
|
2/8/2008 1:09:01 PM |
|
i'm told i am a natural pessimist.i once was told the definition of a clinical depressive was someone who was depressed but couldn't give a concrete reason why,going thru depression when you have reason to be depressed is normal.Being pessimistic when the situation calls for a healthy amount of pessimism seems prudent to me not an indication of a predisposition.Oh well i will leave it to others to apply labels to me.i'll just go about the business of living my life whether the glass is half full or half empty slave mikei'm told i am a natural pessimist.i once was told the definition of a clinical depressive was
|
|
2/7/2008 4:56:45 PM |
|
Another unsolicited offer this one to fly to asia where i would get to spoil,pamper and otherwise cater to asianprincess4u and all i have to do is grab a bag and fly half way round the world..All this and she doesn't even have a profile here..oh yes not to worry about the expence of the flight she works in the travel industry and assures me i will be reimbursed how nice gotta pack byeAnother unsolicited offer this one to fly to asia where i would get to spoil,pamper and otherw
|
|
2/7/2008 3:51:57 PM |
|
seem to be going through a downswing ,emotions wise after an intense weekend full of anticipation and hope.Will have to pull myself through this as currently there is no one else to pull me out of it.If anyone thinks they can help please feel free .When i speak of these downswings i'm mostly talking about my hopes as they pertain to this lifestyle i have great joy and happiness i recieve from other areas of my life(son,family and friends)wouldn't want to give the impression i'm depressed all the time .Nothing could be further from the truth i take great joy in that which brings me joy.I am missing that one part that could complete me someone to worship and obey is that asking too much....i hope not seem to be going through a downswing ,emotions wise after an intense weekend full of ant
|
|
2/6/2008 2:38:18 PM |
|
My thoughts unsolicited and probably unwanted on the state of PA (not the people,the locale)views from the interstate mask the dreariness of the place.Visions of THE DEER HUNTER and every other dreary h'wood version of life in a coaltown permeate everything in small town PA. The grime seems to attach itself and adhere to every surface in every nook and cranny.How life flourishes under these conditions is a testament to the determination of the peoples who populate this region.Personally i would be on the first bus out of town which is pretty much how i wrap this up . No offence was intended this is a personal opnion of mine and mine alone ...slave mikeMy thoughts unsolicited and probably unwanted on the state of PA (not the people,t
|
|
2/5/2008 6:42:43 PM |
|
So the trappings of the real world seem to deny me the 24/7 tpe i was seeking.doesn't seem i can pull the trigger and jump in to a r/t that dedmands i relocate will probably get around to changing profile sooner or later.Just don't have the heart for it now.... failure is mine SHE was everything SHE advertised situation exactly what i expected more warmth and afection than i deserved.....So the trappings of the real world seem to deny me the 24/7 tpe i was seeking.doesn't seem i c
|
|
2/3/2008 11:33:07 AM |
|
Indecision is running rampant within my mind.The weekend approaches and i will go and meet HER.Is this situation right for me,am i right for HER.Do i bring to the table the qualities SHE is seeking.Will i be happy in hicksville U.S.A. simply because i'm submitting is it enough that SHE's a DOMME and i'm a slave ,can i handle the demands, the relocation all of these things and a thousand other thoughts race thru my mind.Will it be simpler if i just look at the weekend and let what will happen after take care of itself....slave mikeIndecision is running rampant within my mind.The weekend approaches and i will go and meet HER
|
|
2/1/2008 2:51:41 PM |
|
An unnamed MISTRESS from a formerly iron curtain country has granted me the opportunity to be one of her TREASURED financial slave's.This without taking a glance at my profile i somehow have found the willpower to resist this tempting offer to have my wallet emptied out.Boy capitalism has really taken root over there hasn't it .I don't really get the appeal of 'financial slavery in the first place but what the hell let's keep the money floating around this country god knows our economy can use all the help it can get ....slave mikeAn unnamed MISTRESS from a formerly iron curtain country has granted me the opportunity to be
|
|
1/31/2008 5:16:57 PM |
|
Hopefully it's the first day of my new smokeless lifestyle.No cigarettes today i hope no cigs tomorow.Any one with constructive advice please message me.SHE has specified any slave of HERS to be smoke free,i was already taking chantix so i was ready to put them down.The extra incentive of doing it to please HER can only help.....Hopefully it's the first day of my new smokeless lifestyle.No cigarettes today i hope no
|
|
1/31/2008 11:37:17 AM |
|
The giants win!!!!!!!!!!!Great game great night.18-1 sounds a little different than 19-0 .Trademark that new england....onto matters of more interest(i hope) to this audience.Meeting Mistress this coming weekend(this will be the longest week of my life).Hopefully SHE wont reject me upon first sight(some self esteem issues)from our conversations i have every expectation of success ,i don't doubt for a minute my willingness to please Mistress i just hope my efforts will be enough and SHE is happy with me...slave mikeThe giants win!!!!!!!!!!!Great game great night.18-1 sounds a little different than 19-0 .Trad
|
|
1/30/2008 7:32:08 AM |
|
Another great conversation with HER.i find each conversation more illuminating,the layers of who SHE is slowly being revealed to me .A WOMEN totally in touch with HER own sexuallity and comfortable in HER own skin(what a pleasure that must be)EAch conversation leaves me anticipating the time when we meet with more urgency.Well they say good things come to he that waits.So i wait ...slave mikeAnother great conversation with HER.i find each conversation more illuminating,the layer
|
|
1/29/2008 5:11:41 PM |
|
I'm in the period of transition.It's been agreed we should meet, in principal SHE say's i'm to be HERS.There is no reason i can think of that this won't work certainly i will do all that's required and more to make HER happy.The waiting comes first,the task that is hardest for me to endure,everything that follows shall be easy.This is intolerable and compounded by those periods when she is away and there is only silence.Silence that cuts me like a dull knife.when will she return,when might my heart start beating again......slave mikeI'm in the period of transition.It's been agreed we should meet, in principal SHE say's i'm to
|
|
1/29/2008 6:58:30 AM |
|
How come I've gotten more unsolicited messages since i stated i was no longer looking is this the bdsm equivalent of the marriage ring that attracts others. Just want to know why people in this community of dommes and slaves with the ratio completely in the dommes favor why so much poaching F.Y.I. i will not be poachedHow come I've gotten more unsolicited messages since i stated i was no longer looking is this
|
|
1/29/2008 4:23:29 AM |
|
Question of the day what to make of profile's that start off with for those that cannot read no men okay i know were stupid but if we cant read what does the larger font accomplish.Is that like speaking slower and louder to people who don't understand english (in the hope that this will improve there english skills) just thought i'd ask ....slave mikeQuestion of the day what to make of profile's that start off with for those that cannot read n
|
|
1/28/2008 6:04:38 AM |
|
All right i've been allowed to change my profile status so i guess i should update my journal.When last we saw our intrepid hero he was trying his hardest to screw things up.Fear and insecurities were having there way with him,and than at the twelfth hour SHE calmed him assured him and told him all would be alright.Now he waits calmly knowing SHE will give directions,set the pace and give him what he craves....till next time slave mikeAll right i've been allowed to change my profile status so i guess i should update my journal.
|
|
1/27/2008 6:42:44 AM |
|
i keep checking sent mail just to see my mail isn't even being read.am i being punished for asking too many questions of HER or is she simply busy.can't do anything but wait.Waiting itself is an act of submission(not enjoyable but submission all the same)leaving me scared and frustrated.Maybe just the way SHE wants me.....slave mikei keep checking sent mail just to see my mail isn't even being read.am i being punished for as
|
|
1/26/2008 5:25:47 PM |
|
slow night all seems quiet ,what thunderclouds must be forming over the horizon.Change scares me allways has.fear paralyzes me it has allways been so,my time runs out,have i made the most of it.When i go to sleep last will i have achieved something more then having lived.....the demented ramblings of the diseased mind by slave mike:)slow night all seems quiet ,what thunderclouds must be forming over the horizon.Change sc
|
|
1/25/2008 6:09:12 PM |
|
When i joined this site it was at the suggestion of a friend,who warned me not to expect too much.SHE was mistaken ,my experience on here has been nothing short of fantastic.in addition to meeting some really interesting people(maybe a few friends).Its possible i've met HER.Been talking for a few weeks and i've fallen to my knees for HER i sit and wait hoping for HER message and when they come i smile and than i laugh.Now i wait for that moment when we meet and hope desperatly SHE finds me acceptible...waiting and hoping till next time slave mikeWhen i joined this site it was at the suggestion of a friend,who warned me not to expect too m
|
|
1/25/2008 4:25:41 AM |
|
Conversations with a Mistress seem to be heading towards 'under CONSIDERATION' status for me.The closer this gets the more bitchy,whiney and needy qualities i start projecting.i will probably torpedo this due to wanting it so much.What an asshole i am.What i need to be doing is step back let THE MISTRESS make her decision and hope its a favorable one,then abide by it .My atempts to affect the outcome are feeble and clumsy.Why are slaves so stupid(this one anyway)Conversations with a Mistress seem to be heading towards 'under CONSIDERATION' status for me.T
|
|
1/24/2008 7:16:33 AM |
|
As promised the rest of the list#6 DARK SIDE OF THE MOON by PINK FLOYD i don' think this choice needs an explanation.#7 DEREK AND THE DOMINO'S by CREAM.LAYLA AND BELL BOTTOM BLUE'S nuff said #8 WHATS GOING ON by MARVIN GAYE.true genius.#9THE JOSHUA TREE byU2.isn't bono a swell guy.QUADRAPHENIA by THE WHO.it changed everything about the rock album.....well as they say that's all folk's till next time slave mikeAs promised the rest of the list#6 DARK SIDE OF THE MOON by PINK FLOYD i don' think this choic
|
|
1/23/2008 9:48:04 AM |
|
i know this is just me and i might take some flak for this but i don't get female submissives.To my way of thinking natural law makes the female the PREDOMINATE gender a female choosing to submit to a man violates this law so go ahead and start sending YOUR vile replies to this submissive male.These replies will only serve to validate my beliefs...slave mikei know this is just me and i might take some flak for this but i don't get female submissives.
|
|
|
|
