" Temp update.....     I now know exactly my place in the lifestyle, I'm no long..."

User Name:

Description:

City:

State:

Height:

Age:

Orientation:

Ethnicity:

Joined:

Last Online:

 bklynbbw

 Submissive Female

 Long Island 

 New York

 5'3"

 50

 Bisexual

 Caucasian

 10/19/05

Temp update.....

     I now know exactly my place in the lifestyle, I'm no longer confused.  I know exactly what I need and want and who. I also know what I have to give and how much I can give.  This self realization comes at a great price though.  This past week I reconnected with an old love, my first real love, but being young and stupid, I foolishly let him slip away.  Through many hours of phone conversations, there were many questions asked and many answers given.  I now know he was the "one".  I would have been a much better person with his guidance, teaching and love.  I always say I feel young at heart, now I know I am just stuck at that age when I lost him and spent the rest of my life since then searching for him...or one like him. The first part of this week was spent in hatred for those that worked so hard to seperate us back than.  I have been talking to a Dom here on CM who asked nothing of me but to think, use my imagination, to find within my self what I needed to know.  It worked, last night all these things just exploded into my consiousness and it was the worst night of my life. So now begins the grieving process.  The pain is unbearable, but I will get through it...I have to so that I can move on.
 ----------------------------------------


Greetings, all!

     I have to add this,  Please, please, if you write to me and do not have a picture on your profile, send one along with the email.   I am not shallow and I do not expect perfection.  I am far from perfect as are most.  But, lets be honest we all have things we like/prefer in looks.    I believe I have just hurt the feelings of a very nice man.   The last thing I ever want to do is hurt someone who doesn't deserve it, he didn't.   I am sorry!

     Another thing to know, I leave myself signed on here even when I am away.  If I do not respond to you right away, it probably means I havent seen your mail yet.  So please dont send an email five minutes later telling me how rude I am for not responding !!  The only thing that will accomplish is getting your email deleted and you will be blocked.  I find impatience such an unattractive quality...especially in someone who considers him self a "dom"

    First and formost, I am here to make friends. Please, If I put you on my favorites list, that does not mean I want to belong to you, necessaraly,,,It means I find your profile and what you have to say interesting and perhaps we can be friends and share ideas.  I do enjoy talking to and learning from those who know more than I. The only thing I will ask, from the onset, is common courtesy. I am a submissive but, I am not YOUR submissive. I am a slut but, I have the RIGHT to enjoy those I CHOOSE to play with.  I'm also a human being and that will let "real" Dominants know that "hi, nice tits" is not the way to go.

.....I came to this site with more trust than I have now.  I came to learn and explore something I have felt inside for a long time, but it seems I keep coming across wanna be's or just crazy people who think that just because I dont have much experiance in the life style that Im an easy mark......Wrong!  I have plenty of life experience and know when someone or something needs to be walked away from.  Is it really so hard to meet a man who is what he says he is?  Who has the patience to teach and watch what blooms?     I hope not...I need to learn what it is inside me, or I will always wonder and be hungry for that knowledge. 

     There is so much that interests me, but scares me as well. I suppose thats where the trust and guidance of a truly good dominant comes into play.

.....Some say I should not call myself a BBW. All I will say about that is: "In my case, it doesn't stand for '[B]ig [B]lue [W]hale.". Perhaps "full figured" or "curvy" would be better. I guess BBW or not is in the eye of the beholder...lol 

.....Either way If stick figures or Barbie dolls are what you like, I am not the woman for you.

.....I was born and raised in NY..and yes..lol  have the accent to prove it.  Also have the NY attitude..which has and does serve me well in my everyday life..but will be put away for "Him".

     I have a good sense of humor (a bit on the sarcastic side)  and love to laugh and make others laugh...please have one too.  If you cant make me laugh I doubt you will be able to do anything else.  For me..this all starts in the mind. If you can capture my mind...well...the rest is easy. I am well educated and well traveled, most of my travels have been in the far east.  My favorite has to be indonesia....I spent 4 months there once learning how to cook the foods...lol.  I dont have a wall of degree's (only one) but am a student of the world.  Meeting and mingling with other cultures is a wonderful teacher.

     My friends in the lifestyle swear Im a switch...I do have a dominant side, I admit it.   One day I may explore that side, but for now, one thing at a time.  

      I love making new friends and talking (Intellegent conversation), so dont be shy....drop me a line.  If nothing else we may become good friends.. 

Be well.

Jo